Nothing beats the magic of Christmas when children are in your life, and for many kids Christmas just wouldnโt be Christmas without Santa. From carefully thought out letters mailed direct to the North Pole*, to seeing the wonderment in a childโs eyes when meeting the man himself in shopping centres, there can be no denying that Santa plays a very big part in a modern family Christmas. And so had it been in our family for twelve glorious fun-filled years. But little did I know that last Christmas was our LAST Christmas with Santa. This year the secret is well and truly out!
So many firsts!

As parents we eagerly anticipate the firsts: the first tooth, first word, first steps, first day of school… each one excitedly ticked off the milestone checklist amidst much joy and celebration. We record them, splash them proudly all over social media, and commit them eternally to memory. The first Christmas and first visit to Santa herald the dawn of new family traditions, and the Christmas magic begins.
The early years are easy – you are your childโs main influence, their trusted teacher, and your child will believe whatever you tell them. Then they start school and outside influences take hold. Ever since Grade Two my son has been telling me about those (dear little) enlightened kids in the schoolyard loudly proclaiming, โSantaโs not real, you know, itโs just your mum and dadโ, and questioning me about โthe truth please Mumโ with sideways glances. Every year itโs been harder and harder to dodge the questions and keep the magic alive. It was inevitable that one day the Santa bubble would burst and so, with mixed emotions, I find myself facing my very first Santa-free Christmas as a parent.
Last Christmas
Last Christmas, as with all our Christmas Pasts, my kids wrote their letters to Santa. Last Christmas, as we have done for years, we created personalised videos sent from Santa at the North Pole** and filmed their nervous anticipation as they watched to see if theyโd made the โnice listโ. Last Christmas I steamed open their letters to Santa because, as usual, I hadnโt a clue what to get them, and I snuck out late night shopping. And, like every other Christmas since the kids could appreciate Santa, I pretended I had a headache and sent hubby and the kids to the movies so I could wrap the presents in secret. Last Christmas the kids left out milk and mince pies for Santa with a thank-you note, and carrots and oats for the reindeer, and last Christmas I diligently chewed up and spat out carrots all over the โlanding stripโ at the front of the house.
The careful planning, frantic gift buying, letters to Santa, and carrot chewing were all lasts. In spite of my best efforts to prolong the magic the kids have heard things at school, overheard comments from childless adults, read things, and seen things that made them question the validity of Santa.
Now my Master 10 is a very astute boy with an investigative journalistโs knack for extracting information. He can twist my words and trip me up until even I have no idea what Iโve just said or admitted to. We were walking the dog back in September when somehow the conversation turned to Christmas. It went a little like thisโฆ
Master 10: I already know Santa isnโt real so you donโt have to pretend any more.
Me: Oh, who told you that?
Master 10: Everyone knows. No one in my year believes in Santa anymore. Itโs just mums and dads pretending so you can relax, youโre off the hook.
Me: OK, thatโs sad. It was fun while it lasted though, eh?
Master 10: What? So itโs true! Mum you lied โ I was testing you!
Oops, he got me.
So many lastsโฆ
But children grow up and, before youโre even ready for it, along come the โlastsโ. Do you remember the last time you carried your child to bed asleep in your arms? Or the last time you read your child a bedtime story? The last piggyback you gave? All these lasts pass us by without our even noticing, and itโs only when you look back and reminisce that you realise you canโt, for the life of you, remember when they happened. If youโd known then that they would be the โlastโ of each occasion would you have taken more steps to make them memorable?
Maybe itโs just as well we donโt know because Iโm sure Iโd have crumpled into a sobbing heap if Iโd realised the last time my kids would hold my hand and call me Mummy, before letting go and reducing me to Mum. The lasts are milestones too and at least I can still fondly recall โlast Christmasโ. Luckily I captured much of it on video too, just in case Santa wouldnโt be around for us this year.
The REAL magic of Santa
After breaking the news to Miss 12โwho was absolutely โdevoโโwe had a conversation about the real magic of Santa. We discussed how, although Santa does not fly around the world on a sleigh pulled by reindeer, he is most definitely not a lie. Santa Claus is very much real and alive. Santa is ALL mums and dads imagined, for the sake of uniformity and magic, as a jolly old man living an incredible fantasy existence, the mere thought of which can light up any childโs imagination and fill them with hope. He is the magic that grown ups create to make childhood fun and special, to create precious family memories, and to give children something exciting to anticipate. His love teaches children about gift giving and gratitude, and to be humble and good. And just like believing you really did hear jingle bells, or the thump of a sleigh landing, or caught a glimpse of Santa when you should have been asleep, so too can you really believe in the things inside yourself that you canโt see or hear, like your talents and strength of spirit.
Santa is a time-honoured tradition and learning the truth of his existence is a rite of passage for all children growing up. I have passed on to my children the responsibility for keeping the magic alive for other kids, whether younger or older, who still believe. Itโs a test of their generosity to hold the secret in their hearts and not ruin it for others, and Iโve every faith in them that theyโre up to the task.
New beginnings
So this Christmas will be different. Thereโll be no letters posted to Santa, no mince pies left out on a plate, no chewing up carrots. This year the Christmas magic has changed โ not gone, just shifted. In many ways itโs a relief; a weight has been lifted. We can go Christmas shopping together as a family this year and the kids can choose what they want without us wasting money on the โwrongโ gifts, and the jolly fat man in red will no longer get all the credit for the most โawesome present everโ when we get it right. Master 10 has his sights set on something he is saving up for so heโs asked for money towards that, and Miss 12 would like some experiences and activities instead of presents, so all-in-all itโs worked out quite well.
We can still pretend itโs Santa (after all, Santa IS all mums and dads), and weโll probably still make a PNP video – only this year I might put the children on the naughty list for something different!
The cat may be out of the bag, but Christmas, and the magic of Santa, will go on!
*If you want Santaโs real address itโs North Pole 9999. The international postage is just 65ยข at your local Post Office!
**Make your own personalised video via Portable North Pole. See the magic here!
Love love love this.. my master 11 is still an avid believer. I’ve long since explained the fact that the wrapping paper is the same as he saw me buy by the fact that he can’t expect santa to wrap them all so he delivers them to the parents to do that for him.. and also that as he gets older and more new children are born around the world, he gives more responsibility to us and he now delivers only a stocking of small surprises that way we get credit for the big stuff ๐
Love this definition of the ‘Real Santa’ ๐